Swagg::Net::Guestbook

Did you adopt this cat from Petco in August 2021? Please reach out, I would like to see him. I found him in a football field. He had medical issues like a prolapsed asshole and probably worms and was super annoying. I couldn’t afford his vet bills and my apartment doesn’t allow pets, so I took him home to bring him to the shelter. We bonded so much over those few days. He’s the love of my life and I should have fought to keep him despite the odds. I know that now. I cry looking at pictures of him. His name at the shelter was Squash; we named him that. Please… I wanna see my friend again.

@everyone Please DO NOT EAT FACEMASKS (or any other items that were not meant to be eaten) IN THE VOICE CHAT. I'm not sure why some people have such under developed social skills that they think that a server full of mostly male strangers would need to see that. No one is going to be impressed and give you a kiss, (especially considering what you have been consuming). Eating items that were not meant to be eaten could cause serious harm in your body, and being polish is not an excuse to that. I don't want to add this to the rules, since it would be embarrassing for new users to see that we have a problem with this, but it is going to be enforced as a rule from now on.

Damn I wish my body looked like that. I would go to the beach and have a pal throw me a football, then I would catch it right beside some cute girls and start chatting with them while being a really nice guy but not too nice. Then I would invite them for a dip in the water. Then with some playful water fighting I would figure out which cutie wants my body the most. Then I would ask her if she wants to go for a walk. Then in a secluded area I would ask her if she wants to hear a secret? Then I would lean in like I'm going to whisper in her ear and I would kiss her neck instead. Then we would start making out hard in the grass and I would squeeze her boobs. But she is on her period so she stops me from fingering her. Then we get married and have kids and I get a dad bod and she dumps me because she is shallow and only loves me for my rock hard bod. The end. I could keep going but it spirals into a depressing situation.

breaking news: gargron removes "posting" from mastodon: (posting is bloat)

Life, liberty and da pursuit of swagginess

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I have a confession... I am extremely attracted to the Hog rider from the hit games Clash of Clans (also abbreviated as CoC 🥵.)🥵.)) and Clash Royale. Every morning I wake up with an extreme boner imagining the rider smashing my balls with his mighty gold-gilded hammer while I ride the hog from behind and scream out "HOG RIDEEEEEEEEEEEEER!!!" Every time I think of him and see him, I imagine the hog he's riding is me. It truly does pain me every waking moment of everyday where I realize that I cannot be with the Hog rider. I am nothing without the hog rider 🥺😭😭🥺🥺

here's a proof that we're all the same person, look at me posting this from all my alts

I want to be pinned down by a bunch of thicc femboys. I struggle to escape but have no chance against their massive booties and bulges on my face. Eventually their heat and musk put me in daze and I can't even hope of getting away from them. They turn me into their little toy as I drown in their thiccness

Yo yo yo isss ya boi mistermonster up in the hizzouse comin atcha from deep inside the bowels of the interweb. I really dig this joint, expecially the tunez and the captcha