Messages from the World Wide Web


Tue May 02 05:22:26 AM EDT 2023

Potato wedges probably are not best for relationships.

- Brittany Petros


Sat Apr 22 10:26:33 PM EDT 2023

No, I didn’t pay for Twitter. I paid for free speech. I paid for 1776 to commence again. I paid for the Founding Fathers’ vision. I paid to tell Silicon Valley to go screw itself. I paid to show support for a man who put himself in the line of fire for the First Amendment. I paid because we support our own. I paid because if George Washington was alive today, he’d be paying too. So next time you say I paid for Twitter, just realize how IGNANT (or ignorant, depending on your preference) you sound!

- Anonymous


Thu Apr 20 10:52:33 PM EDT 2023

Sauce is confidence. Meat is the people around you who give you false confidence (no meat just sauce). You can sprinkle sauce to others. You aren't born with confidence, you learn it (becoming seasoned). You can become over confident and lose your humility (getting lost in the sauce). You don't need money to be confident. The sauce gets you money but getting lost in the sauce will get you caught up.

- Anonymous


Mon Apr 17 10:16:09 PM EDT 2023

HOW CAN I BE A HATER WHEN I Own Every Battlepass: πŸŽ‚ Bought all the MERCH: πŸ‘Š Cleared Every Event: 🐐 Watched all the Cutscenes: πŸ˜‡ Been there since Day 1: πŸ™ Got it on my Spotify: 🎡 Its not that im HATING im just stating FACTS when I say Fortnite is MID! πŸ’―πŸ”₯πŸ—£οΈ

- Anonymous


Mon Apr 17 10:14:47 PM EDT 2023

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- Anonymous


Sun Apr 16 09:47:00 PM EDT 2023

Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.

- Anonymous


Sun Apr 16 09:44:01 PM EDT 2023

own a longsword for home defense, just like ye lordes of old intended. four rapscallions break into my cottage. β€œthe bloody fuck?” as i grab my helm and swordbelt. ram a five foot blade into the first man, he’s dead on the spot. draw my seax on the second man, it doesn’t penetrate mail because it’s british and bruises his ribs. i have to resort to the ballistae mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with a serrated point, β€œyour mother was a hamster and your father smells of elderberries!” the bolt catches two men and shreds them, the force cracks my sidewalk and sends concrete flying. draw flail and run down the last terrified bandit. he dies of brain damage waiting for the police to arrive since blunt force trauma can’t be healed. just as the lordes of olde intended.

- Anonymous


Sun Apr 16 09:42:13 PM EDT 2023

Cleavage? AUUUUGAA! HONKA HONKA! Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! eyes pop out accompanied by trumpets AROOOOOOOOGA! jaw drops, tongue rolls out, WOOF WOOF WOOF, heart beats out of chest, AWOOGA AWOOGA sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair, I take out a boxing glove and hit myself with it 17 times. Turns to the audience and say in 1930’s New York accent β€œHOT MAMA, now that’s a dame!”

- Anonymous


Tue Apr 11 10:16:42 PM EDT 2023

So the line I came up with is "I don't mean to be rude and I certainly don't want to be creepy, but (I gesture by bringing my hands up and cupping them around the breast area) are amazing." Then after she blushes and says thanks follow up with "I don't mean to be out of line, but would it be ok if I could have a feel?" So what do you think? What do I need to tweak to make it work?

- Anonymous


Mon Apr 10 10:37:58 PM EDT 2023

An egg cream[1] is a cold beverage consisting of milk, carbonated water, and flavored syrup (typically chocolate or vanilla), as a substitute for an ice cream float.[2] Despite the name, the drink contains neither eggs nor cream.[3] It is prepared by pouring syrup into the tall glass, adding milk, lightly stirring it with a spoon, then streaming soda water into the glass, mixing the other ingredients. Ideally, the glass is left with 2/3 liquid and 1/3 foamy head.[4]

- Edgar Kreem (Homepage)