Messages from the World Wide Web


Thu Mar 03 07:35:53 PM UTC 2022

My girl caught me in bed with a man. As an alpha male how do I tell that I am so manly that I need to sleep other men to absorb their testosterone. It ain’t gay cos I am so manly other men are like women to me. You guys feel me?

- Anonymous


Fri Feb 25 01:11:26 AM UTC 2022

I have a message for Putin. If you want to do your games, your shenanigans, that's fine by me. Truly, it is. But I just got home from vacation, it was fun, I enjoyed it. As I am now home, I get to enjoy my video games. And Putin hear me now: If, by any means, a cyber attack comes through because of the sanctions and takes my internet away while I am enjoying said video games, on my country's goddamn internet soul, then that will be your biggest mistake. What mistake you might ask? Well, my dear Putin, your mistake will be that of taking away games from a gamer. If you make this mistake I will show you what its like to be torn apart, just like the USSR. I will show you what gamer swag truly means. I will make you feel the pain and anguish of every victim of 9/11, every soldier in Vietnam. Your very soul will cry out in agony as your body burns to dust. Nothing will stop me from bearing down all of my immortal gamer swag on your being. So to all else who see this, pray to whatever you believe in, pray that Putin does not make this mistake. For the moment he does, I give the Kremlin 12 hours. 3 hours to prepare, 3 hours to try, and then 6 hours to mourn. Sincerely, a Patriot/EVE Online Commander

- Anonymous


Wed Feb 23 08:41:17 PM UTC 2022

I built my own router, and packed it full of security and traffic analytics. Just to test, I took my uncle’s laptop with 100 virus’ because he won’t update it (antivaxxer) and plugged it into my network. Oh the worms tried to spread. But you know that scene from Helms Deep? Imagine that, but all our boys defending the wall are Doom Marines. All the gross orc viruses get they punk ass DROPPED! This is like what would happen if Trump’s boarder wall was made of 500ft of re-enforced concrete and had railguns and all sorts of unnecessary bullshit! Then I decided to run dd if=/dev/zero of=/dev/sda and vaccinate the fuck outta that laptop! Then I tossed it at my uncle like “vaccinate bitch!”

- Anonymous


Tue Feb 15 02:15:48 AM UTC 2022

Roman numerals being created by the Romans is a myth. The Roman numeral was actually created and used by a group of gallic tribes in Northern France. Rome eventually took over that area but the Gallic tribes maintained a sense of independence and kept utilizing the system for themselves. As the northern gallic tribes became more and more integrated into Rome, they started to benefit greatly from trade because of their easy access to both Rome and their sea trade routes to the Baltic states. As a result of that, they developed a heavily mercantile culture which ultimately resulted in more and more of them doing direct business in Rome. The reason why we think Rome had the numeral system is exactly because the records that survived were the ones which were made by the northern Gauls. We have more recently discovered that Romans themselves counted by smearing poop on walls like tally marks. It made it really difficult for them to count over a hundred, especially since they would sometimes just run out of poop. There was even an entire system created to solve this problem where the Roman senate (and later the emporers themselves) pooped in this one really big pot so all of Rome could continue counting. In at least one instance, a warehouse which had a huge supply of tally-marking poop caught on fire. It is said that all of Rome smelt numbers for weeks.

- Anonymous


Thu Feb 10 06:46:01 PM UTC 2022

helo ims me, hi

- forever (Homepage)


Thu Feb 10 02:57:57 AM UTC 2022

Last office I worked at, nearly every day someone would go in and just completely fuck up one of the stalls. I’m talking, they would put an entire roll of toilet paper in and around the toilet, shit on top of it, all over it, all around it, on the back of the toilet, on the floor, piss all over it. Nearly every day. And you look around and think “This is a job. I interviewed to work here. They asked me about my college degree. The person that did this… are they like me? Do they look like me? Do they act like me? Why is it when they go into the bathroom, they become a deranged lunatic?” I can’t comprehend it. I can comprehend someone homeless, addicted to crack or huffing paint, going into a Taco Bell and doing this. I can’t comprehend a coworker, in an office building, being capable of earning a salary and also treating a bathroom like a horse stall. It escapes reason.

- Anonymous


Wed Feb 09 04:12:40 AM UTC 2022


- pi (Homepage)


Sun Feb 06 07:54:11 PM UTC 2022

No one with a right mind would download piece of garbage operating systems on their computer for "privacy" there is no privacy on the internet and there wont be any. There are many hackers and such that used Linux this doesnt mean that every linux user is a criminal. But most are. When you look at a linux user, they dont use any software of big corporations, use throwaway accounts, dont use tiktok, instagram (major social networks), use reddit or 4chan where the most brainless people on earth talk to eachother. its pathetic and really something that does not get mentioned at all in the linux community. to you this might be a dumb claim and conspiracy theory, but if someone were to ask you if you run linux that already answers most of your behaviour you contribute to the internet. No criminal would use an operating system and major social media or tools that the majority of people use. There are many cases of Linux users being psychos. Please tell me, in what fucking use case other than criminal activities would you use something like Tails or Whonix, public wifi? VPN, you dont need a different operating system for that. Also a reminder, facebook discovered a 0day exploit in TailsOS to catch a pedophile. Oh and lets not forget about edward snowden, repeated as above "not every linux user is a criminal but most are".

- Steve Ballmer (Homepage)


Sat Feb 05 07:25:42 AM UTC 2022

IM, uh, DELETING YOU, uh, MY FELLOW AMERICAN! ██]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 10% complete..... ████████]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 35% complete.... ████████████]]]]]]]]]]]] 60% complete.... █████████████████] 99% complete..... 🚫ERROR!🚫 💯True💯 Americans🇺🇸🇺🇸 are irreplaceable 🇺🇸I could never delete you, uh, American!💖 Send this to ten other, uh, 👪Americans👪 who would give their lives for 🇺🇸Murica🇺🇸 Or never get called ☁️Murican☁️ again If you, uh, get 0 Back: Drone strikes for you 🚫🧔🏾‍♂️👩🏾🚫 3 back: you're off the travel ban list☁️💦 5 back: you have pleased Obama greatly🇺🇸💦 10+ back: OBAMA CARES FOR YOU 💯💪🇺🇸🇺🇸

- Anonymous


Wed Jan 26 01:15:12 AM UTC 2022

I live walking distance from my local police department. If another person uses my NFT without my consent I will report them immediately. This is MY PROPERTY. The transaction has be verified scientifically on the block chain. Anyone who violates my NFT rights will pay the price Buddy, you have no idea who you are messing with. I have made a ridiculous amount of money in crypto/NFTs and I have the best lawyers. If you don’t remove my NFT as your profile picture you’re going to regret it. When you steal someone’s property you get punished. Watch out.

- Anonymous